“How do you look when you feel sad, what are some things that make you
feel sad, what can you do if you feel sad.”
It is important to explain all of these things when discussing feelings
so your child knows how to communicate his feelings and how to begin to solve
your feelings with your child. Make sure
that these are age appropriate conversations.
If something makes you feel sad, frustrated or angry, let your child
hear this. Also let him hear how you
work through these feelings to feel better.
When another child is upset in a social setting, take this as an
opportunity to talk with your child about how that child is feeling and how you
know. It is often difficult for children
to understand how others feel.
Explaining how you know when someone is upset will help your child with
“That’s mine!” This may be a familiar phrase in a house with a young
child. It is natural for children to be
resistant to sharing a favorite toy, but it is important to give kids practice
with how to share and why it is important.
your child involved with playing and sharing with other children. Teach him to use sentences like, “Can I play
with that when you are done?” when he wants something. Teach your child how to thank someone for
sharing a toy. It is also beneficial to
talk to your child about how he feels when he is playing with another child’s
fun toys and how he makes others feel when he shares his toys.
All children have their own personalities. Some are shy, some are more outgoing, but all
could benefit from a conversation on how to talk to new friends. As you prepare your child to go to
Kindergarten, talk with your child about how to start a conversation with a new
friend. You will want to model and help
your child with this whenever possible.
Teach your child to say, “My name is ____. What is your name?” Help your child think of things that he can
share about himself and hear about someone else. Children often like to share about their
family, pets, favorite toys, shows, color, etc.
When you and your child are out and about, let him see you “make
friends” with others. Encourage your
child to talk with other children he encounters. If your child is shy or apprehensive, don’t
force it. Instead talk with the other
child yourself to model how to do it.
Acclimating to a new situation:
Help your child prepare to enter new situations by giving him a process
to follow in any new situation. Talk
with your child about what makes him nervous about new situations and make sure
that addressing these fears is part of the process. A new situation process can include scanning
the room for familiar or favorite items.
“I see books and I love to read.”
I see art materials, maybe we will do art projects.” Another part of this process is gathering
questions, “where do I sit?” “Where do I
hang my coat?” A child who is concerned
about finding a bathroom, might first scan to see if there is a bathroom in the
new environment and if he doesn’t see one, he will make this a question to ask.
Model this for your child whenever you enter
a new situation. When you go to a new
doctor’s office, enter the door and verbalize, “I see a desk with a woman
behind it, just like at your doctor’s office, that is probably where I go
first. I can probably ask her my
questions, too. Let’s see, I see seats
and magazines to read. That is probably
where we wait for the doctor. I want to
ask where the bathroom is in case I have to go.” Let your child practice this by visiting a
different library or playground